Showing posts with label Mani Shankar Aiyar. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mani Shankar Aiyar. Show all posts

Monday, 12 September 2022

Mani Shankar Aiyar thinks the Queen attended Eton!

Why has the Nehru-Gandhi dynasty survived into the the 21st century? One answer is that it represents 'English' values to people who make great play of their superior skill at speaking English, or their Academic qualifications from England, but who are wholly ignorant of England and, withal, as stupid as shit.

Consider the case of Mani Shankar Aiyar who thinks the late Queen attended Eton- a boy's school!  He writes in the Indian Express- 


If the British monarchy has survived into the 21st century, that has a lot to do with the manner in which Queen Elizabeth II carried the crown.

This is foolish. An exemplary monarch whose heir is a mischievous cretin won't be able to save primogeniture based succession. The cretin will be barred from the Succession. 

Aiyar was a shite diplomat before becoming a brown-nosing politician lifted up by Rajiv and then his widow Sonia. But Sonia is a genuine  'pativrata' and thus a worthy Regent of the Dynasty Aiyar mindlessly serves. But, she can't preserve it. Had Rahul agreed to replace Manmohan with Montek, Congress would still be a potential ruling party. But cretins like Aiyar- but also the less reptilian Jairam Ramesh- have harmed it beyond any hope of repair. Why? They would neither accept a technocratic CEO nor cease to pretend to be the mischievous and malicious voice-boxes of the Roi Faineant.


It was a manner singularly free of the turbulence that surrounded the late Queen’s seven decades on the throne.

This is meaningless. The Queen carried the Crown because the legitimacy of the 'Crown in Parliament' was free of turbulence. 

Aiyar is as stupid as shit. To be fair, he immediately ensures that everybody understands this-  

The basic reason is that from her tutor at Eton who groomed her to become the symbol of her nation,

How the fuck did Princess Elizabeth attend Eton? Did she disguise herself- like Barbara Striesand in 'Yentl'? What Aiyar means is that she received instruction at home from the provost of Eton. 

she learned well the distinction that the 19th century British political scientist, Walter Bagehot, had drawn between a British monarch’s “dignified” and “efficient” duties.

Indians living in India may think this Aiyar- who has a degree from Cambridge- is making some abstruse legal point. Curry & Chips Cockneys- like wot I iz- know different. Bagehot was balderdash. The distinction he made was already otiose or wrong-headed. The Crown in Parliament is supreme. It can create or extinguish distinctions even between Common and Canon Law or that of King's Equity. 

Aiyar plumes himself on his 'posh' English accent. But he went down in flames when, on British TV, he tried to square up to Andrew Roberts.  Shashi Tharoor, on the other hand, could mop the floor with any Righty-Tighty-Whitey. 

Had she deviated from that distinction

Mani was an IFS officer when the Queen sent a signal- at variance with that of Mrs. Thatcher's Parliament- with regard to South Africa (which had left the Commonwealth more than two decades previously)- in perfect and absolute conformity with her independent role as Head of the Commonwealth. 

I believe that the Queen also did much at a very personal level to undo suspicion of American subversion in Australia It is foolish to pretend that she did not fulfil her Constitutional role to promote proper outcomes without, so to speak, leaving a footprint. But this did not involve 'dignity' or the sort of 'magic' upon which daylight can't be let in ; rather, the thing was transparent. Aiyar must remember the Queen and the Archbishop signaling opposition to the Thatcher Reagan combine on South Africa. Indeed, Rajiv's foreign policy was obsessive on this issue. But, Reagan and Thatcher triumphed. The Soviets did a deal. The Cubans went home. Apartheid could fall. 

The prestige of 'the Crown in Parliament' gained because the Crown had sent a different signal but, in the end, that dissonance was merely tactical and was not considered unconstitutional in England.  

and allowed the crown to get caught in a swirl of controversy, it is doubtful that King Charles III would so smoothly be stepping into the succession.

Sadly, the last quarter of the Queen's reign was scarcely smooth sailing. The Queen showed courage in tackling the  bull by the horns with her frank 'Annus horribilis' speech- but this did not really assuage  popular grief at Diana's death and anger at 'the firm' (as Prince Phillip referred to the Palace authorities) It may be that the Queen headed off damaging political fallout by getting both John Major and Tony Blair on side. We don't know whether the Queen took steps to defend primogeniture- she probably did- but it is clear that the Palace took gradual steps to ingratiate Camilla with the public thus rehabilitating Charles. No doubt, the Queen's long reign was helpful in this respect as was the good conduct of William and Kate. But the Meghan controversy must have made her last years harder more especially after the death of her husband. 

It may be that less will be expected of Charles and William will take a bigger role. But he is likely to have a more sedate and uncontroversial approach than Charles who belonged to a more outspoken generation.


Queen Elizabeth was not destined to be Queen or Empress. If her uncle, Edward VIII, had not so detested the duties of being King (while reveling in the great comforts of the flesh which the throne conferred) he might have hesitated before marrying an American divorcee, thus bringing on his abdication.

Apparently, he had proposed to the Queen's mother so, one way or another, the throne would have been occupied by the child of that formidable, but diminutive figure.  

It was only this that brought his brother, Albert, to the throne as George VI, a role he played with grim determination despite the handicap of never having been prepared for it, not wanting it, and suffering from a speech defect that rendered every public statement an agony for his tormented soul.

It has been suggested that the strain cut short his life. However, in Churchill, the Queen found a chivalrous knight errant. Lord Mountbatten- Phillip's Uncle- too could be quite helpful.

Also, her parents had failed to give the family a son, and thus, at 25, Elizabeth, his eldest daughter, had to fill in when George VI died in 1952. It was symbolic of the times that she was on holiday in Kenya, a distant corner of the Empire with her husband Philip, Duke of Edinburgh, when she learned that her father had passed away and she was required to succeed him. It was an Empire that was marked by history to fade away before she had quite completed a decade on the throne.

The story is that she was staying in the famous 'Tree-top' hotel near Mt. Kenya. Seldom has a girl gone up a tree only to descend as a Queen.  


Indeed, the jewel in the crown had been forced out a few weeks before she was married in November 1947. She was never, therefore, Empress of India.

Because India had become a Republic. But the Queen continued to reign over Pakistan till 1956 and Ceylon into the Seventies. 

Notwithstanding that, her reign extended at the start over a vast swathe of the world, encircling the globe from the West Indies on the far side of the Atlantic Ocean to numerous colonies in west, east and southern Africa to a host of islands in the Pacific, besides the White Commonwealth where the inhabitants fought against the 20th century by remaining monarchies even after attaining full Dominion status.

The Old Commonwealth countries fought valiantly in two world wars. In the case of Canada, dishing the monarchy would have brought the Quebec issue to the boil. Australia has legitimate defense concerns and will need a nuclear deterrent of its own if wants to take the Republican path.  

Her most doleful duty was to preside over the independence ceremonies of virtually every one of these distant outposts of the Empire.

The Queen normally did not attend such ceremonies. That task was farmed out to lesser royals.  

She did so with dignity, never letting nostalgia for the past lend a touch of gloom to the change of guard. In this, she was greatly assisted by the pageantry with which her husband, Philip, and her uncle, Prince Louis Mountbatten, were obsessed: Medals, uniforms, brass bands, orders of precedence and other baubles.

Naval officers understand the value of such ceremonies which build esprit de corps. After all, it is part of their professional duty to show valor in the face of death. Prince Phillip was considered very good at raising the morale of British officials and civilians in distant parts of the world. Anthony Burgess has commented on this. 

The Empire, therefore, slid with dignity from her young shoulders while, thanks in large measure to Jawaharlal Nehru, she remained the Head of the Commonwealth.

India chose to remain within the British Commonwealth. It had no say in who would be its head. The fact is, India continued to neglect its Navy- there was a British Admiral till 1958- and has only now fully indigenized its Naval flag.

In that capacity, she brought continuity to historical change and greatly helped the transition from a colonial relationship fraught with bitter memories to a new, modern relationship between friendly sovereign countries.

That had already been accomplished. Mountbatten deserves a lot of credit for charming Nehru. Indeed, till Nehru's death, Mountbatten had more influence on Indian defense arrangements than anybody else. After that, he lost influence and Harold Wilson got rid of him.

In all this, she was greatly assisted by her strict training to not say anything controversial, remain politically neutral and to be guided by the elected government of the day in her home country. She stuck to the dull but dignified line they put out. She was also thus able to survive the many gaffes that her irrepressible husband tended to make on many of these solemn occasions — as, for instance, remarking in the hearing of the press that the son of General Dyer, the Butcher of Jallianwallah Bagh, had told him that the number of deaths in 1919 had been hugely exaggerated.

That was true enough. But Nehru and Rajendra Prasad had already written of the Mahatma's insistence that bogus testimony be stricken from the record. 

It wrecked the goodwill that the Queen and her government were hoping to rake in from ceremonially touring India on the 50th anniversary of Independence.

Nonsense! Robin Cook, the new Foreign Secretary, told the Pakistani press (which was the Queen's first destination) that Britain would take up the Kashmir issue with India. This was the British version of 'vote-bank' politics. Prime Minister Gujral responded by calling Britain a 'third rate power'. Cook then denied saying anything about Kashmir and Gujral followed suit. The visit got off to a bad start with Sikhs demonstrating against the British Army's ban on turbans. Phillip's remarks added to the tension. It was a disastrous visit. Indian diplomats felt that Gujral, himself an ex-diplomat, had handled things poorly. The Brits tended to blame Robin Cook who had a reputation as a Leftist and a Republican.  


By then, the Crown had suffered far greater embarrassment back in the UK. It began with the rumpus over her sister, Princess Margaret, wanting to marry a divorced commoner,

Margaret needed the Queen's permission to marry because she was under 25. Later she decided not to give up her right to the succession. This was in the mid Fifties. She then did marry a commoner- but not a divorcee. Later, in the seventies, there were some sex scandals featuring her but sexual mores had changed greatly. In any case, the succession was assured.  

but gathered steam in the social (and sexual) revolution associated with the rise of the Beatles generation, which, along with contraceptives for women, ushered strait-laced Britain into the Swinging Sixties.

The Queen remained popular during the Sixties because she was an attractive woman with an attractive brood of children. Even in the Seventies, the Sex Pistols 'God save the Queen/the fascist regime', was dismissed as play acting. The nation fell in love with Diana and initially welcomed her sister-in-law 'Fergie'. It is said that the appearance of the Royals on a TV program 'It's a knockout' was the beginning of the end of deference to what was seen as a family of inbred nitwits.  

That promoted so much irreverence that it could not but touch Buckingham Palace. So, when Diana, the People’s Princess, married and then divorced the heir to the throne, there was a huge wave of public sympathy for her, accompanied by an equal measure of distaste for her married alternative.

It was Fergie's separation from Andrew, in 1992, and some subsequent sex scandal which alerted the public to the fact that all was not well in the House of Windsor. Diana's separation from Charles in 1996 was a bigger problem because, unlike Fergie, Diana had been a virgin while Charles appeared to have been continually unfaithful to an older woman who looked like a horse. 

When Diana died in a car crash in Paris in 1997, it seemed the throne might be shaken.

Charles, like Andrew, tried to get the Media on his side but the attempt backfired- though not as horrendously as Andrew's car-crash interview where he claimed to be unable to sweat.  

There has since been no lack of scandal swirling around Elizabeth II’s other children and grandchildren.

But William and Kate are in the clear. The Succession is assured. We can put the things which went wrong in the House of Windsor down to the 'spirit of the times'. William represents a more sober generation which has a clear understanding of the pitfalls associated with promiscuous sex and dirty money.  


If Elizabeth II survived this social tumult, it was because

Charles could be excluded from the succession. There is a lesson here for dynastic parties like Congress.  

British democracy and the monarchy knew how to change with the times. By remaining a steady symbol of stability in a churning ocean of change, the Queen upheld the torch of monarchy by keeping her counsel to herself and continuing to reign as a non-political and non-controversial Queen.

It appears that the Queen did quietly influence legislation to protect her own interests. 

This required the greatest restraint and adherence to what she had been taught as a young woman about the role and duties of the British sovereign.

In which case, much credit must go to her mother who passed away 20 years ago. Her role in the creation of the modern monarchy is second to none.  

While her own family were plagued with personal issues and her country underwent the most profound changes in its adjustment to the new world order, including pleading its way into Europe and then petulantly walking out, the Palace was never part of any argument and steadily maintained the course of continuity.

But Mountbatten was killed by the IRA. Not everybody thought kindly of the Royals family.  


When she first became Elizabeth II, with Edmund Hillary and Tenzing Norgay conquering Everest on the eve of her coronation, it was fondly believed by most of her subjects that even as Britain under Elizabeth I had started her quest for greatness, so under Elizabeth II, would Britain be restored to world dominance.

The Elizabethan era was not one of conquest but did feature literary excellence and an increased role for oceanic trade. The second Elizabethan era was supposed to be about the Arts and the Sciences and maybe Wilson's 'white heat of the technological revolution' and Blair's 'Cool Brittania'.  

Instead, the Empire of her predecessors was dismantled brick by brick and, as Dean Acheson, the US Secretary of State remarked cruelly but truly in 1962, Britain had “lost her Empire and failed to find a role”.

Sadly, Nehru didn't get the memo. He continued to do whatever Mountbatten asked him to.  

It is to the credit of Elizabeth II that even while retracting from the world dominance that Elizabeth I had initiated in the 15th century,

The Sixteenth Century. Aiyar must be getting senile. But then he also thinks the Queen studied at a boy's school.  

half a millennium later, she held her own in a period of national retreat.

I'm not sure what this means. The Queen did her duty and secured the succession. But misbehavior or incompetence can get one barred from the Succession. Congress should take note. 

That surely will remain the lasting monument to her reign. Britain remains — for now at least — a monarchy, while kings and queens around the world lose their crowns and oftentimes their heads too.

Britain is similar to the Benelux and Scandinavian 'bicycling monarchies'. Going forward, it will have a slimmed down Royal Family which is content to appear dutiful but dull. Netflix will look elsewhere for material.  British youth has changed for the better. It is now much more thoughtful and content with a sedate pace of life. There was a moment when the House of Windsor fell prey to the cult of celebrity. But today's icon of glamour is tomorrow's fodder for tabloid jackals. If we must have Queens- let them be Beyonce or Kardashian. Similarly, if Congress must have Gandhis- let them be Mahatmas plying the chakra in remote Ashrams. Primogeniture is all very well but cretins must be barred from the succession. 

Wednesday, 4 May 2022

Mani Shankar PK Congress ko revive karega

Mani Shankar Aiyar writes approvingly of Prashant Kishore's ideas for reviving Congress. Unfortunately, he doesn't get that Congress needs a Manager, not a Consultant. If PK were running Congress, factionalism and intrigue would fall because there would be confidence that decisions were being made on an objective basis and with the goal of winning elections, forming governments and presenting a united front to defeat anti-incumbency.

It is certainly unusual for consultants to wish to become executives.

Consultants can 'head hunt' executives capable of implementing the new business plan.  There is no reason why a consultant might not be on such a list- if the market has confidence in him. 

I doubt that McKinsey or Boston Consulting Group or Ernst & Young have ever suggested that they get co opted to the board to ensure that their recommendations are carried out.

Having been a McKinsey consultant greatly increases your chances of becoming a CEO. Indeed McKinsey has been called a CEO factory. Plenty of Accountancy firms supply CFOs to their clients some of whom may become CEOs.  

That is for the company who hired them to make up their minds.

If it has a mind. 

I suspect that some PK recommendations will eventually be accepted and some not; sometimes, the recommendations accepted would be those that really matter; sometimes, it is only the fringe suggestions that would find acceptance.

In other words, Congress will continue to do stupid shit.  

PK has brushed aside all nonsense of running the Congress without the Gandhis.

So, this is a family firm. But the family can step back to ceremonial roles while a professional is brought in as CEO. Had PK been that CEO, Congress would have gained credibility. As things stand, talented people continue to leave the party. 

He has suggested alternative scenarios of the role the Gandhis may play but in each of them, he has ensured that the Gandhi triumvirate is accommodated in the highest positions.

Ceremonial positions.  

This will displease the armies of Gandhi-baiters but will resonate with the Congress rank-and-file as the family is built into their DNA.

But defection is even more strongly built into their DNA.  

Among those whose DNA is not so constructed are to be found the defectors and potential defectors,

i.e. people who, conceivably, some other party might want or those who have the gumption to form their own party. 

but for those who do not abandon ship even at this critical juncture, there is the deep and abiding conviction that it is the Gandhis who together constitute the glue, or the bonding adhesive, that keeps the party together and gives it an all-India profile.

Sadly, Rahul is so utterly incompetent that all over India, Congress candidates have got a bad name. Moreover, factional intrigue within the party, fostered by Rahul, brings down even those leaders who attracted votes off their own bat.  

They are, of course, aware of the dire straits in which the Congress finds itself at present but are each persuaded that our condition would be even worse but for the pervasive presence of the mother and the siblings in the party leadership. Recognition of this is one major merit of the PK proposals.

This is foolish. It was obvious that either the dynasty would hire PK to run things or else they'd muddle along as usual. Their instinct is correct. PK is young. If he gets his feet under the table, Rahul will be cut off from the type of sycophancy and intrigue which he enjoys. Priyanka will have to take a back seat so her son's career can develop. The fact is she has proved useless in UP. Sonia can finally retire. 


The other major merit is that his proposals open the doors for elected leaders to occupy key positions from which to guide the party out of the shoals.

But those 'elected leaders' will use the cachet they gain thereby to jump a sinking ship.

That is what G-23 mean by “collective leadership”. Instead of a group of favourites constituting a non-transparent coterie around the leader,

which is the essence of dynastic rule 

PK’s proposals give various alternatives that would ensure the presence of elected and, therefore, “representative” and “responsible” voices in the deliberations of the key policy and organisational bodies of the Congress. (These two phrases are not PK’s but Rajiv Gandhi’s in the context of Panchayati Raj).

This would create the familiar problem of a tussle between the 'rank and file' members (some of whom would be 'entryists' representing extreme ideologies) and caucus of elected or electable legislators from the Party. The BJP benefits from having the RSS behind it. This limits the scope for factionalism and intrigue. Had PK taken over the management of Congress, people would have had confidence that sensible decisions would be made and that the party would become electable, be able to form stable governments and even defeat anti-incumbency.  


To my mind, the most persuasive of these is the proposal that Priyanka Vadra be made the general secretary in charge of coordination.

This is a terrible idea. Coordination must be an executive function. Put her in charge of the women's wing or something of that sort while ensuring she gets enough TV time to build a fan base- as she is well qualified to do.  

While this may cause some heartburn to the current and any aspiring general secretary (organisation), I would reckon hard decisions emanating from Priyanka after due consideration and debate on controversial issues would carry wider sanction within the party than from other sources.

Unless it was PK or some other guy known to be smart and focused on winning elections 

This is essential to keep the party together.

The party can afford to lose senile fools like Aiyar. It can't afford to keep losing elections and getting wiped out in State after State. 


The crux of my argument is that PK has given the party a great deal of hard data and many suggestions on which to collectively reflect.

Did it really not have access to this before?  

Those points remain on the table, with it being open to wiser heads to give their own presentations. There is nothing “take-it-or-leave it” about PK’s proposals

which is why they are useless. I suppose PK wanted to leave himself an escape hatch.  

— even if the man’s personality and personal attitudes give the impression of a know-it-all

There are other good consultants but PK has made himself a brand. 

who would be rebuffed if anything were changed. However, by suggesting alternative scenarios at every turning, the proposals, in themselves, leave it to the party to pick the preferred route or even to explore yet other alternatives.

moving deckchairs on the Titanic is never a good idea. 

What is important is not each particular but preserving the integrity of the perceptions and predictions that inform the PK narrative. They are less rigid and self-assured than the proposer might be personally.

So, they are useless but PK's brand hasn't been dented. Moreover, he has kept the door open for 'repeat business'. Smart. 

Friday, 5 March 2021

Aiyar, Ansari & the Dynasty dying nasty

Ex-diplomat and ex-Minister, Mani Shakar Aiyar, reviewing ex-diplomat, ex-Veep, Hamid Ansari's autobiography, writes in Open Magazine

The ‘sit-up-and-take-note’ moment comes at p.189 of this autobiography. Soon after Ansari’s election as Vice-President of India, the Chief Ministers begin paying courtesy congratulatory calls on him, as is the standard practice. Among the earliest to do so is Narendra Modi, CM of Gujarat. Ansari asks him whether he might pose the chief minister a question he would have liked to have asked in his previous capacity as Chairman of the National Minorities Commission. Modi graciously consents. Ansari then asks why he allowed the post-Godhra happenings to take place in 2002. Modi responds that “people look at only one aspect of the matter” but no one paid any attention to the “good work he has initiated, particularly for the education of Muslim girls.” At which, Ansari suggests this should be publicised and Modi replies “that does not suit me politically”!

So, do good by stealth and evil blatantly, gets established as the new political morality.

This is an odd lesson to draw. Clearly, the Hindu majority in Gujarat thought that Modi had done good, that too openly, by cracking down on both Muslim terrorists as well as the petty hoodlums involved in the riots. 

On the other hand, as Ansari well knew, some Muslim terrorists oppose education for Muslim girls. Indeed, the whole world knows the name of Malala Yousafzai. She has received a Nobel Prize. Aiyar must be very naive not to understand that a politician in a volatile part of the world would not want to draw attention to the education being received by Muslim girls. Aiyar's buddy, Rajiv Gandhi was blown up by a suicide bomber. Surely he understands that assassination does not suit ambitious politicians- though no doubt their Party might benefit from a sympathy wave.  


As the holder of a constitutional office, Hamid Ansari drew on his vast reading to skate around the thin ice of his position by citing others to drive home the point he was making.

This is foolish. The Vice President and ex officio Chair of the Upper House is never on 'thin ice' unless he is acting in an unconstitutional manner. If he is doing his job properly, there is no need to 'skate around anything'. This does not mean the Veep can take an independent line from the President. Still, Ansari was better educated than Patil and so Aiyar may have thought he had a bigger role. But, the fact is, Sonia refused to give Kalam a second term so as to put in a loyalist. Ansari, being Muslim, 'balanced' the ticket. However, his second spell was as the junior to Pranabh- a heavyweight. It is the latter's opinion of Modi which matters. Ansari's does not because

1) like Aiyyar, he was an ex-diplomat- i.e. a brown nosing lightweight

2) his cousins are a bunch of feudal gangster politicians. Thus Ansari can't really get too much above himself. Modi could well have asked him what he thought of his cousin killing a Hindu MLA from Modi's own party

Aiyar thinks Ansari is erudite. But erudition must be wide, not narrow. Aiyar gives the impression that Ansari had a very limited range of intellectual interests & cultural affiliations. 

 In fact, scanning the footnotes in this volume is an education in itself. The authors he cites run to hundreds ranging from constitutional authorities like B.N. Rau and Granville Austin

Why not Ambedkar? The answer, I suppose, is Aiyar and Ansari are old fashioned casteist, elitist, darbari courtiers 

to historians of West Asia like Allal al-Fassi,

who wasn't a historian and who only knew about North Africa, not 'West Asia'. 

Barclay RaunkiƦr

who was an explorer who died young.  

and Anthony H. Cordesman

who is a National Security Analyst, not a historian.

Aiyar is trying to impress us with his own erudition. But it turns out to be completely bogus.  

to poets new and old like Nimah Ismail Nawwab,

who is a light-weight and whose first volume was only published in 2004 

Jamil Sidqi al-Zahawi,

an Iraqi Kurd who was considered outdated by the Nineteen Thirties. Still, uneducated people liked him even in the Sixties. 

and the renowned Persian verse-master, Hafiz,

Aiyar has lumped Hafiz together with the literary equivalent of Pam Ayres. It is usual to refer to Hafiz as 'the voice of the unseen' or some other such exalted title. 

to scholars such as Richard Hrair Dekmejian

who is definitely minor league- though, no doubt, an American patriot 

and Wilfried Buchta

who is even more minor league and not even American 

to Persian and Urdu literary luminaries and Arab theologists.

As we would expect from an Urdu speaking Muslim. On the other hand, we would not expect Aiyar to quote 'Tamil and Sanskrit literary luminaries and Hindu theologians'. Why? He is a deracinated piece of shit.  

Ansari spent the books allowance that Foreign Service probationers receive on buying all three volumes of Isaac Deutscher’s biography of Leon Trotsky!

For heaven's sake why? Trotsky was a mad dog. Churchill summed him perfectly while the fellow was still a decade away from Stalin's ice-pick. Trotskyites did help fuck up Sri Lanka- and thus contributed to Rajiv's death- but they had no influence on India.  

There appears to be no end to Ansari’s life-long quest for knowledge in every sphere of human existence in an astonishing variety of languages.

But not Sanskrit or Hindi or Gujarati or Tamil. Ansari believed that ' upper castes had restricted Sanskrit exclusively to themselves but social reformers such as Guru Gobind Singh and Swami Vivekananda understood that exclusivity of the language had to end for the society to become more egalitarian.' The fact is some formally 'untouchable' castes- e.g. Valluvars in Tamil Nadu or, Niradh Chaudhri's 'sambandhi', the 'Law' lineage of West Bengal were Sanskrit scholars whereas many Brahmins were illiterate in that language though perfectly able to recite mantras faultlessly. 

Still, it is good to know that Ansari approved of the 'social reform' instituted by H.H Guru Gobind Singh. However, Muslims in Sikh territory were less enthused.

What is also remarkable is the wealth of his sources ranging from daily newspapers to authoritative articles in learned journals through slim pamphlets to thick tomes, and a ready ability to grab the quotable quote.

This suggests a shallow mind and a facile pen.  


Significantly, the chapter on his education is entitled ‘Cultivation of the Mind’.

As opposed to what? 'Mastering Masturbation'? 

His was cultivated at Aligarh Muslim University by the likes of Mohammad Habib, who taught the history of political thought, an interest initially sparked in young Hamid, when he was in a science course, by Harold Laski’s An Introduction to Politics and A Grammar of Politics, polished by readings of ‘Plato, Aristotle, Marsilius of Padua, Thomas Hobbes, Machiavelli, John Locke, Rousseau, T.H. Greene’ and George Sabine.

This was at a time when young Americans could learn game theoretic approaches to politics & I.R.  Sabine was decidedly old hat. Learning about 'Shapley values' has a direct application to Indian politics or the sort of shite diplomacy India was doing at that time. Cretins like Aiyar and Ansari had their heads filled with shit and thus were shitty diplomats and, later on, shitty, brown nosing, darbari courtier place-seekers. 

As Professor Mohammad Habib was left-leaning, Karl Marx and even the Thoughts of Mao Tse Tung were part of the curriculum.

But Mao's thoughts were a fucking catastrophe for China!  

He was introduced to the history and politics of West Asia, a subject on which he became the Foreign Service’s foremost expert, by Muhammad Hashim Kidwai, who ‘gave me a character certificate that was embarrassingly generous’.

But the Foreign Service's expertise on 'West Asia' was shit. Israel mattered. Brown-nosing various tinpot dictators or despots was foolish.  

Inevitably, he came top of the class with a ‘first class first in honours’, and accordingly received the Sir William Maris award, followed by similar academic distinction in his MA. But he was no rat burrowing away in the University’s Lytton Library. He made hordes of life-long friends and kept wicket for the University cricket team. An early indication of his destiny to preside over the Rajya Sabha was his gradual transition from behind the wickets to umpiring. He also met his friend, Yadullah Kazmi’s sister, Salma— who, as he puts it, was ‘assertive and very much the mistress in her own turf. I had no idea then that she would resurface later in my life!’

So Ansari had Muslim patrons of his own class. Cool. But it is his cousins who have maintained their caste privilege in the traditional way- viz. killing Hindus.  

Ansari intended to have a career in academia

he was certainly stupid enough to do so 

and appeared for the competitive administrative services exams with no enthusiasm, and principally at his father’s behest. In consequence, he was placed relatively low in the list and came into the IFS ‘by happy accident’ because someone higher up declined the offer of the IFS in favour of the IAS. He spent most of the next 38 years in ‘Registan’ (the desert), as I once heard him putting it colourfully.

Meanwhile a lot of other Indians went to those deserts and built up careers and businesses and helped those places to rise up. Indian diplomats were despised by this class of people. 

He began in Baghdad where he eyewitnessed the Ba’ath revolution of 8 February 1963 that initially brought President Abdul Salam Arif to power after toppling Brig. Gen. Abd al-Karim Qasim, who had, on 14 July 1958, dethroned the Hashemite dynasty, which was cobbled together by the British in the post-World War-I era, after betraying the promises of freedom conveyed to the Arabs to get them to revolt against the Turkish Empire. Arif quickly gave way to the pro-Nasser al-Bakr/Saddam Hussain faction which went on to rule the roost for the next four decades. Ansari saw that by walking about a kilometre through the scene that had been subjected to bombardment from the air. ‘I was glared at on the way by a tank commander,’ who, happily, was not trigger happy and so Ansari survived.

My impression is that Ambassador Mehboob Ali was better at getting a handle on the crazy shit that was going down at that time in Baghdad. There was even a Dictator who, on Nasser's orders, mounted a coup against...himself! He complicated matters by fleeing to Cairo to request asylum- whether refugee, or lunatic it skills not to ask.  

There appears to be no end to Hamid Ansari’s life-long quest for knowledge in every sphere of human existence in an astonishing variety of languages.

Except those of the Hindu. 

Having braved the Ba’ath revolutionaries, it was something of a cakewalk to approach Dr. Asadullah Kazmi, head of the UNESCO mission in Baghdad, to seek the hand of his daughter, Salma. Ansari had been ‘bewitched’ by her ‘cigarette-smoking and sherry-sipping in fairly conservative surroundings’ but, while ‘fancy’ soon turned to ‘obsession’, his own ‘diffidence’ combined with her being apparently ‘disinterested’, had kept matters simmering instead of being driven to a conclusion. They got permission to spend their ‘blissful’ honeymoon in the Kurdish mountains in the vicinity of Salahuddin.

In which case it can't have been in that Governate.  

This was much envied by the diplomatic corps. An ‘elderly’ Soviet official enquired whether he could not be given similar permission only to be told that he too could go ‘for similar purposes’!

There had been a Kurdish Soviet. The Iraqis weren't going to let a 'Soviet official' anywhere near their Kurds.  

The Ansaris next moved to Rabat, the capital of Morocco, where, apart from being introduced to the Arabic of the Maghreb, they discovered the charms of Fez and Casablanca, were educated in the role of the Berbers in the history of the region and saw their first child born. The posting was brief and over soon. Jeddah followed soon after.

So, the IFS regarded Ansari as a 'token' Muslim to be sent off to unimportant Muslim countries.  


In Jeddah, Ansari earned his spurs by making arrangements for Indian Muslim pilgrims to the annual ‘hajj’. He was eventually to supervise nine such pilgrimages, which, he has consistently held, is a religious duty only ‘for those who can afford the journey’, citing verse 3:97 of the Qur’an, and has, therefore been opposed, in principle, to the Hajj subsidy extended to Indian pilgrims by the Government of India.

So, he backed Syed Shahabuddin who, however, was not a sycophant of the dynasty.  

He was also involved in ‘difficulties of political reporting’ from a station where ‘much depended on a discerning study of the local media and the occasional cartoon that conveyed a message to the initiated’, backed by ‘chance remarks’ that had to be ‘noted’ and contacts cultivated on an ‘individual basis’.

Why does Aiyyar skate over the 1965 War? Perhaps, he and Ansari weren't in the loop. Only after Indira decided to break with the Syndicate did these guys, who looked Leftist, begin their ascent.  


He returned to New Delhi in October 1969; I had returned a few months earlier and we established a friendship that has lasted a lifetime. I found him both deeply informed and full of wit and humour, gracious in his manners and unfailing in his courtesies, always ready for a laugh or a serious discussion, our common interest being in Palestine and our common commitment being to a secular India.

Palestine is meaningless for India. As for 'secularism', what does it offer what was then the 85 percent majority of the people? Aiyar & Ansari were not interested in  liberating the productive forces of the country from a 'license permit Raj' which their own foreign postings saved them from suffering too much under.  

I must confess, however, to not having discerned the extraordinarily distinguished future that lay in front of him.

Why not? The precedent for faceless nonentities to put in a spell as Veep had already been established.  

To me, he was always just a good friend. I hope this does not detract from my being an objective reviewer of his autobiography. Our friendship was then reinforced by a joint posting to Brussels, where Ambassador K.B. Lall, ‘a patrician of the old school’ who was ‘a hard taskmaster but unstinting in his praise of work he considered worthwhile’, made, it would seem, a less lasting impression on Ansari than on me. We lived together through the horror of the start of the Emergency (which he does not mention but is marked by my memory of his calling me over to watch the ticker tape on the telex machine in his room as it rattled out the arrest of virtually every Opposition politician in the country). I openly mourned the death of democracy. Ansari was, typically, more restrained in his oral observations.

My memory is that Mani Shankar was swaggering around some bogus Turd World Conference in New Delhi during the Emergency. He was a Leftist but one who could turn his coat- i.e. not a Haksar type.  

From Brussels, Ansari moved to Abu Dhabi as Ambassador to the United Arab Emirates, via a quick diversion to Jeddah, and after false alarms of Kuwait and Iran having been signalled to him by Headquarters. I followed to Baghdad and so we remained in close touch. When he met the governor of Al Ain, who was also chairman of the Abu Dhabi National Oil Company, Ambassador Ansari remarked as they sat down to dinner that ‘our country was thirsty. This puzzled him and he said the monsoon brings enough water. I clarified that our ‘thirst’ was for crude oil; he responded handsomely and resolved our problem’. As deft an act of professional diplomacy as any I have heard.

These guys are cretins. They believed- in the way that people like Jonathan Aitkin believed- that all these Oil Sheikhs have come straight out of the Arabian Nights. For their part, the Arabs laughed heartily at the proverbial stupidity of the Indians. 

Aiyar immediately illustrates this-  

As for the growing army of the Indian diaspora, regarding which there had been some adverse observation arising from the Iraqi press, Sheikh Rashid, the ruler of Dubai, told Ambassador Ansari: “Tell your government that Rashid al-Makhtoum does not retire for the night till he is satisfied that his gate is guarded by an Indian”.

You guys are very poor. But you are too stupid to be disloyal. Go tell your government that we will treat you like chowkidars.  


On the completion of his term, Ansari was appointed Chief of Protocol, a task he performed with such aplomb that, after his remarkable performance at the NAM summit in March 1983, he was awarded the Padma Shri and started his dizzy climb to the top of the pole. While Prime Minister Indira Gandhi was highly appreciative of the tact he displayed in smoothing ruffled feathers, which is on the daily menu of any CoP, his biggest headache was to organise the care and security of the hordes of VIP visitors who came to her funeral in the midst of the Sikh carnage that had overtaken the city. Not only had one of his deputies, a Sikh lady, to be rescued from the rampaging mob, he also had to find replacements for the numerous Sikh drivers of the buses that had to be hired for the transport of our distinguished guests. Indeed, ‘one foreign dignitary and two of our senior people were actually transported in a police patrol car’ to the funeral.

Aiyar doesn't explain that the carnage against the Sikhs had been sanctioned by his good buddy Rajiv.  


That over, he found himself posted as High Commissioner to Canberra, Australia, a post where, as his departing predecessor ruefully noted, ‘there is not much content, let alone liveliness in Indo-Australian relations.’

Australians were extremely racist. They wouldn't let a turbaned Sikh diplomat play on their golf courses.  

That radically changed with the advent of two leaders in Australia and India—Bob Hawke and Rajiv Gandhi—who took to each other with decided warmth, their common target being Margaret Thatcher’s very reactionary stand on apartheid in South Africa.

Bob Hawke got Jim Wolfhensohn to come up with financial sanctions which 'put a dagger into the heart of Apartheid'. No South African has said anything similar about Rajiv's obsession with this issue.

I accompanied Rajiv on his visit to Australia in October 1986, which was marked by a storm raised by a senior Australian aboriginal civil servant, Charlie Perkins, over Rajiv having used the expression ‘backward’ in relation to the affirmative action being undertaken by India in favour of a historically disadvantaged section of our population. Perkins took offense at this ‘racist’ expression and I had my work cut out drafting an explanatory letter from RG to Perkins as we flew to New Zealand explaining the background (India being the only country in the world where the label ‘backward’ is considered a badge of privilege!). Ansari too had his work cut out pacifying Perkins and extending an invitation to him to visit India as a special personal guest of the Prime Minister, an invitation that was not accepted. Happily, however, the storm died out. Ansari does not mention the contretemps.

India was such a shithole that its main diplomatic headache was the criticism of an Australian backbencher who, though white enough in complexion, had some aboriginal blood. 

In April 1989, Ansari was moved to Kabul. ‘Representing India in Afghanistan’, he writes, ‘necessitated an awareness of recent happenings as well as ancient history.’

What a profound observation! Needless to say, India remained on the backfoot in that part of the world.  

Accordingly, he boned up on his next assignment reading everything he could lay his hands on in libraries and antique bookshops

Surely the Embassy would have already had these books?  

from Vartan Gregorian’s classic, The Emergence of Modern Afghanistan to Rosanne Klass’s Afghanistan: The Great Game Revisited, passing through Dilip Kumar Ghosh’s England and Afghanistan and G.P. Tripathi’s Indo-Afghan Relations, 1882-1907.

Wow! How fucking shite is the IFS? Why does India not have better material for its Head of Mission to read? One answer is that the professional journalists whom Nehru had taken into the XP Division were sidelined by jealous IFS officers. I imagine our Intelligence officers were simply illiterate and could not supply the deficiency.

India had and perhaps still has the worst diplomats in the world. Their chief qualification is their desire not to live in India without actually breaking with the country and the caste system that sheltered them. Ambitious diplomats take the path of sycophancy to advance in politics. But their lack of substance soon becomes apparent. 

Aiyar hints as much-

For an able diplomat, self-education never ceases. He was rewarded for his assiduous studies by almost being blown up in a bomb explosion on 6 March 1990 at his Kabul residence that left a 6-feet deep crater in his garden and ‘blew away the first floor of the house and the chair in which I had been sitting’—just ten minutes after he had left, ‘by happy accident’, for his office in the chancery.

What is Aiyar saying? If the reward for assiduous diplomatic study is not getting blown up then fuck diplomatic study and the horse it rode in on. Do your brown nosing in New Delhi. Get a Ministerial berth. Maybe someone will make you Veep. 


Earlier, UN personnel had suggested that ‘shatter-proof film be put on glass panes of windows to guard against rocket or bomb explosions in the vicinity’. Delhi delayed responding, so Ansari resorted to a cricketing metaphor to cable: ‘If I have to field at forward short-leg, I need protective gear.’ The cable ‘found its way, unscreened, to PM Rajiv Gandhi’s table’. While being reprimanded by some humourless, faceless bureaucrat

like Aiyar himself 

‘to use standard vocabulary’, the shatter-proof film was duly dispatched. Otherwise, the reckoning might have been sterner.

So, even 'UN personnel'- widely known to be as stupid as shit- were able to tell the Indians something useful. This is because the Indian IFS is utterly shit.  

He got on well with the Afghan President, Mohammad Najibullah,

Wow! What a fantastic achievement!  

who asked if Lata Mangeshkar and Amitabh Bachchan might be tapped to canvass for him if elections were held. When Afghan security officials at New Delhi airport were arrested in a scuffle after they spotted a rival of Najibullah’s attempting clandestinely to board a flight to Kabul, Najibullah encountered Ambassador Ansari at a presidential palace reception and remarked in chaste Urdu, ‘Do you know that if I were not here, the flag of Pakistan would be flying over this building?’ The impasse was fortunately resolved before long.

What happened to Najibullah and his chaste Urdu? India abandoned him. The Taliban dragged him out of the UN compound and tortured him to death. His corpse was paraded through the streets.

Why is Aiyar drawing our attention to Ansari's bonhomie with a tragic figure? There was a reason Muslim countries didn't want Muslim ambassadors from India. They believed they were just token appointments. On the other hand, the garrulous Aiyar could be relied upon to serve the anti-Indian cause. 


Of Najibullah’s failure to more meaningfully associate his ministers with his regime, Ansari asked one of his minsters about the powers he exercised. Next day, the minister sent him a poem by Abdu Rahman ‘Shafqi’ of Bokhara

there is no such poet.  

which in translation reads:

‘From the gate to the roof of the house is to be mine,
 From the roof to the sky is to be yours.’

In other words, my Ministry is mine. Everything else is the President's. This is a perfectly correct sentiment.  Did Ansari really misunderstand it? Much depends on whether the poet was a particular personage in Afghan politics. But Aiyar is no help to us here. He is too ignorant. 

Such verses pepper the account of his days in Kabul and Iran, to where he was shifted after India-Iran relations ‘hit rock bottom’ in 1990. At his farewell call, Najibullah gave him an autographed photograph, saying, ‘I am a Pushtun; I do not trust the Iranian.’

The silly man should have escaped with the Tajiks rather than trust to the UN to protect him. Like the IFS, the UN is useless.  


TEHRAN WAS just about the most demanding job for an Indian Ambassador at the time, principally because of the ‘situation’ in Kashmir and ‘the rights of the people of Kashmir’.

Defeatists like Aiyar don't understand that India should be telling Iran and Pakistan etc. that they are much smaller and weaker than India. If they fuck with us, we will fucking destroy them sooner or later. Instead, the IFS thought their job was to display their arseholes and whimper for buggery.  

Ansari handled the delicate assignment with finesse, citing Jawaharlal Nehru on India and Iran at his presentation of credentials to President Akbar Hashemi Rafsanjani as ‘twins separated in childhood but reunited as grown-ups through a tune familiar to them as children’.

WTF! Why not just sing the theme song from Amar, Akbar, Anthony? How fucking stupid and worthless were our diplomats?  

That did not stop the Iranians from criticising India but did lead to a senior Iranian official telling the Indian ambassador, “A situation in your country has pained us. We do not have a remedy; (but) we know you have it. We urge you to use it, get rid of the pain and you shall not hear about it from us.” Wise words that still reverberate.

Fuck off! The Iranians have been slaughtering their own by the thousand and the hundred thousand. Why should India listen to them? What? They have terrorists at their command? Well, two can play at that game.  

‘Step by step,’ Ansari writes, ‘the bilateral relationship between Iran and India, vacillating between convergence and drift, tended to revert to its diversity that was based on the mutuality of interests,’ best expressed in a verse from the 17th century Persian poet, Ali-Quli Salim, who wrote that there is no perfection in Persia, for ‘henna does not develop colour until it comes to India’!

Wonderful! So we should have an Islamic Revolution and Ayatollahs running amok all over the place! Iran was trying to make mischief for us at that time but that was because we weren't threatening to retaliate.  

But then the destruction of the Babri Masjid happened. The Iranians were mollified only when, on instructions from Delhi, Ambassador Ansari told the Foreign Minister ‘the mosque shall be rebuilt’ and the Foreign Minister responded, “That is satisfactory; I shall convey it to the leadership.” Of course, P.V. Narasimha Rao failed to keep his promise. The Iranians must have wondered, ‘Who is more devious? We or the Indians?’

Are they still wondering? No. Why? Modi fucks up those who attack India. Why pretend that India welcomes all and sundry intervening its internal affairs? Do we really need to send out diplomats with well oiled assholes to offer up for punitive sodomization? How does it benefit India?


A few weeks later, Ansari was transferred to New York as our Permanent Representative to the UN, a post generally held in the IFS to be second only to that of Foreign Secretary.

Because it is completely useless.  

But New York was no bed of roses. Pakistan was determined to internationalise the Kashmir issue and the Pakistan Foreign Minister Abdul Sattar’s speech at the UN was ‘acerbic and had to be responded to in kind.’Throwing off his usual polite restraint, Ansari thundered, “All the waters of the East River (that flows along the UN building) cannot wash off the stains of falsehood, prejudice and perversion” that characterised Sattar’s intervention. The dispute went on in the Organization of Islamic Cooperation and the Human Rights Council in Geneva. When a Pakistani diplomat told Ansari privately that India must accept that ‘the face of Kashmir is turned towards Pakistan than India’, Ansari responded that ‘the Kashmiris’ faces are turned towards themselves’. No assessment has proved to be more searching.

Sheer gibbering idiocy. Pakistan is weaker than India and must be made to understand this. Also it is a shithole which exports terrorism. Modi has broadcast this simple message far and wide.  By contrast, Ansari- as Ambassador to Iran- hurt Indian intelligence's ability to monitor and counteract Iranian support for jihad in Kashmir. Perhaps Ansari thought militant Islam was useful to the Indian Muslim. What he did not foresee was that sooner of later there would be a Hindu backlash. Once Hindu Nationalism became Indian Nationalism the Aiyars and Ansaris would be disintermediated from Indian diplomacy. 

Within two years, the Ansaris were back in ‘Registan’ on an assignment in Riyadh that stretched beyond his official retirement to all of five eventful years. ‘A fresh start was sought to be made’ when Manmohan Singh, as Finance Minister, visited Saudi Arabia and was the proximate cause of the Ansaris moving from New York to Riyadh. It was Ambassador Ansari’s job to nurture that ‘fresh start’. He did so with notable success, including making Saudi Arabia the principal source of our oil supplies; looking after the growing community of Indian expatriates, the largest and best-behaved in the Kingdom, of whom the Saudi intelligence chief, Prince al-Turki, said: “It is one community about which unlike some others I have no worries”; and monitoring the Saudi transition to modernity.

Ansari did not fuck over the Indian community in Saudi Arabia. Good for him. He wasn't an Aiyar level cretin.  

He returned to India for good at the end of the previous millennium and launched a post-retirement career in researching, writing and speaking on West Asian affairs that attracted scholarly attention.

Nonsense! Nobody quotes him. But there are other ex-IFS officers of even greater mental vacuity.  

Nobody knew it at the time, but his public life was only just beginning and would unfold over the next two decades, first as Vice-Chancellor of his alma mater, AMU, then as chairman of the National Minorities Commission, with short stints at the Centre for West Asian and African Studies, JNU; the Observer Research Foundation; and the Academy of Third World Studies at Jamia Millia Islamia.

So, this was the usual cursus honorum for the token Muslim 'show-boy'- as Jinnah called Congress Muslims.  

He also served on the National Security Advisory Board and undertook miscellaneous assignments with Pugwash and the Asia-Middle East Dialogue in Singapore; was named a member of the India-UK Round Table; and participated in an India-European Union seminar. And as Minister of Petroleum and Natural Gas, I asked him to chair the Advisory Group on Oil Diplomacy and Energy Security that I had set up.

Saddam had fallen by then so, unlike ex-IFS Congress wallahs like Natkat Singh, these guys weren't getting rich off Iraqi oil. Thus, I suppose, such sinecures were financially welcome. 

Moreover, he called on Prime Minster Vajpayee with a team of eminent, concerned citizens in the wake of the deplorable Godhra incident and the vicious pogrom that followed, besides chairing one of the five Working Groups on J&K established by Prime Minister Manmohan Singh dealing with ‘confidence-building across segments of society’.

Is Aiyar really saying Godhra- where Hindus were massacred- was deplorable? No. He means the post-Godhra riots. Whatever happened to the C.M of Gujarat back then? What's that? He is a two term Prime Minister? Well, in that case, Ansari and Aiyar are useless tossers who, unlike Manmohan, have done nothing whatsoever for the country except, in Aiyar's case, losing a few votes for the Dynasty and, in Ansari's case, defying the Government line on Iran's atomic program. 


Out of all this hectic post-retirement work, Ansari emerged as a public intellectual of considerable renown.

He appeared a paid agent of the Iranians.  

His academic papers, newspaper and magazine articles, and many lectures, ranged from West Asian, Iranian, Palestinian, and Afghan issues to matters nearer home regarding the condition of our minorities, the state of our constitution-based democracy and the pressures on secularism. Some of Ansari’s key observations, reflections and suggestions will be dealt with later in this account. The point to note here is that he won such recognition for erudition, balanced judgement and a firm anchoring in public morality, that seven years after he left the Foreign Service for a quiet return to his first love, academia, he found himself the choice of a cross-section of political parties for the high constitutional post of Vice-President of India and, hence, chairman of the Rajya Sabha.

Because he was Muslim and Sonia was replacing Kalam with a Hindu lady who used to cook nice dishes for her mother-in-law.  

I must confess to sharing the apprehension expressed by several fellow-MPs who wondered how such a cultivated, modest, gentlemanly personality could preside over a House that had deteriorated into destructive disruption, but Ansari astonished us all by taking chaos and abuse in his stride.

But, since he was no longer an IFS officer, he was not actually offering a well oiled asshole to all and sundry.  

He kept his cool, was accommodating to a fault, but decisive when it came to the crunch. And inevitably became the butt of much criticism, even derision, at the hands of the Opposition and a large swathe of the media.

He was attacked for being anti-Indian. 


Yet, he was to preside over 33 sessions of the Rajya Sabha, covering a period of ten tumultuous years that witnessed ‘two general elections and one change of government’. He tried, then gave up the attempt, to base his chairmanship on the unanimously adopted 1997 ‘Agenda for India’ resolution on the 50th anniversary of Independence when he found the Leader of the Opposition (Arun Jaitley) justifying ‘Parliamentary obstructionism’ as a tactic to prevent an issue from being ‘talked out’, while his counterpart in the Lok Sabha held that ‘not allowing Parliament to function is also a form of democracy’!

Which Modi seems to have curbed. 

Chairman Ansari’s attempt to impress on the House that it was necessary to assess ‘the impact of disruptive behaviour on public opinion’ made no impact on opinion in the House. (Here, I fear, he was wrong. The ‘public’ were so forgiving of, or even enthused by, the abandonment of all decorum that they rewarded the disrupters with victory in 2014 and an even bigger victory in 2019. Westminster traditions have remained a foreign transplant that have not taken root in our Parliamentary soil!)

Compare Ansari to Meira Kumar as Speaker of the Lok Sabha. Jagjivan Ram's daughter too was an IFS officer. But she wasn't shitty at all. She was the picture of grace.  She'd have made a great President.

Aiyar does not mention that Rahul's failure to step up to the plate was the reason for his Party's decline and further decline. 


In his customary end-of-session address, his acute observation that the 226th session “is likely to be remembered for the work that was not done” fell on deaf ears, as did his observation at a meeting of Rajya Sabha party leaders in April 2013:
“We have to correct our individual and collective behaviour. We have to learn to play by the rules that we have made for ourselves and restore decorum and dignity to the House.”

We get it. Ansari was shit at his job.  

My most vivid memory of that period (when I too was a Member of the House) was of two TRS members who so endlessly disrupted proceedings that they were eventually rewarded by the state of Andhra Pradesh being split to create Telangana! So much for ‘individual and collective behaviour’, ‘decorum and dignity’.

Our most vivid memory of Aiyar is that he was beaten up by Arun Singh.  

Chairman Ansari recognised this and sought various legal ways of redressing matters that no one else seemed much concerned about correcting. He brought up Article 118(1) of the Constitution, which lays on the House the responsibility of safeguarding, amending or deleting the rules that it had itself made. There were no takers.

Because had zero diplomatic skill. 

He tried to bring Zero Hour forward but while this was accepted, the consequent attempt to schedule Question Hour in the late afternoon met with resistance—because most members preferred a siesta after lunch to returning to Parliament for the afternoon discussions. He regretted the absence of members from sessions of the House little knowing that members signed the register in the lobby to collect their generous per diem allowance, then disappeared.

Is Aiyar right? Did Ansari really not get that the Rajya Sabha is a shithole? People sign in to get their per diem and to gorge at the subsidized canteen.  


Ansari confesses that his attempt to name and shame those who entered the Well came as a cropper because whatever happened later, disruptors secured the satisfaction of ‘drawing attention to his/her grievance, and live TV coverage greatly assisted the impulse’. (I myself found that live TV coverage of my moving menacingly towards a Member who had accused me of being a ‘Pakistani agent’ received a thunderous ovation in my constituency because they thought my physically assaulting the man had been censored! This, alas, is how opinion in India reacts).

Naresh Aggarwal, of the Samajwadi Party, looks more robust than poor old Aiyar. Anyway, Amar Singh, of the same party, had already beaten him.


The one measure taken by the Chairman that secured applause from the BJP-led Opposition was his decision to not allow legislation to be put to the vote in the midst of a ‘din’. But when the BJP came to power, PM Modi actually visited Chairman Ansari in his chambers to complain that his government’s legislative agenda was being delayed because the chair was sticking to the stand it had earlier taken to enthusiastic approval from the very party that had welcomed the ruling of ‘no vote in a din’ when in Opposition but was now demanding that Bills be passed, din or no din. This is what has caused the impasse in the Farm Bills when not even a clearly sounded demand for division was not entertained by Ansari’s successor.

There are no two ways about it. The Rajya Sabha is a shit-hole. Abolish it.  


‘The Vice-Presidency,’ observes Ansari, ‘offers a formidable pulpit’ to expatiate on pressing national issues, covering ‘polity, governance, rule of law, security, human rights, religious harmony and secularism, minority issues, culture and gender issues’ besides foreign policy.

This is not the case. The Veep represents the President of India who is bound to act on the advise of the Prime Minister. Ansari misused his office and was reprimanded for it.  

This he did in over 500 public lectures over his ten years in office. He was, however, constrained by the proprieties of holding a constitutional position. So, he resorted to the device, available only to a person of his erudition, to put in the mouths of other thinkers the thoughts and reflections that were, in fact, his own.

In other words, he cheated.  

Notwithstanding this, some of his remarks landed him in public controversies and finally resulted in PM Narendra Modi criticising “your ideology” in his farewell address in the Rajya Sabha when Ansari’s decade in the chair ended. Modi was, however, right in suggesting that the end of constitutional office would enable Ansari to cast off the shackles and voice his opinions in less constrained and more assertive terms. Hence the 50 pages or so (pp.269-317) of summaries of his key set speeches while functioning as Vice-President and a similar number of pages (pp. 318-342) of his post-VP period serve as a kind of rising crescendo to his deliberations on, among numerous other issues, the place of the Muslim in contemporary India, the challenges with which the community is faced and the way forward, as well as the manner in which these challenges have changed between his seven years in office under the Congress-led UPA (2007-2014) and the last seven years, in and out of office, under the BJP-led NDA (2014-2021), a study in contrasts.

Indeed. Under the UPA, India was defeatist. Hindus were considered potential terrorists. Under the NDA, the shoe is on the other foot. We wonder why anybody bothered with the likes of Aiyar or Ansari.  What purpose had they served? 


In his Jamia Millia Islamia convocation address (2015), the Vice-President built his remarks around the theme enunciated by Abid Hussain’s famous aphorism:

Insaan-e-kamil, sachcha Musalman, pucca Hindustani

(a complete human being, true Muslim and confirmed Indian)

Insaan-e-kamil means a perfect human- like Prophet Muhammad. To modern ears, this has a blasphemous sound. 

Ansari urged that while that “settled the core of Indianness of Indian Muslims”, it was essential for Muslims to “balance the imperatives of identity” with “the ability to conduct a dialogue with fellow-citizens in a secular society” and to cope with the “ever-changing patterns of life through the Islamic concepts of Ijtihad (independent judgement on a legal or theological question based on Islamic rules of interpretation) and Maslaha (requirements of the current situation)”.

This would only be the case if there were no uniform Civil Code. Under laicisme, there is no question of dialogue or independent judgement. The Law is the Law. If you don't like it, emigrate. 

With this as his theme, he underlined that while what he delicately called ‘the events of August 1947’ had cast ‘a shadow of physical and psychological insecurity on Indian Muslims’,

because Muslims voted overwhelmingly for the Muslim League and Partition.  

burdening them ‘unfairly’

why unfairly? It was the League which insisted on dividing the country and then performing ethnic cleansing though this would mean that Indian Muslims would be condemned to a second class status.  

with ‘the political events and compromises that resulted in the Partition’, there had been some ‘painful’ but ‘gradual recovery’ from that trauma. Yet, ‘much more needs to be done’. And, in this context, he raised the conclusions of the Justice Rajinder Sachar Committee report which ‘demonstrated that on most socio-economic indicators, they (the Muslims) were on the margins of structures of political, economic and social relevance and their average condition was comparable to or even worse than the country’s acknowledged historically most backward communities, the SCs ad STs’. Therefore, the ‘pre-requisite’ for Sabka saath sabka vikas was ‘affirmative action to ensure a common starting point and an ability in all to walk at the required pace’.

Sadly, this was something which Ansari and his ilk can't help with. They don't know how the poor can get ahead. All they can do is talk bollocks about how Iran must get nuclear cooperation.  

Reciprocally, he asked his own community to go beyond ‘looking at questions of identity and dignity in a defensive mode and explore how both can be furthered in a changing world’.

What is the point of repeating this nonsense decade after decade? Muslims know very well that they can only get ahead through hard-work, family values, thrift and enterprise. Talking bollocks about maslaha or ijtihad is utterly useless. Something more business like and sensible is required.

This required sustained ‘struggle’ to actualise ‘in full measure their legal and constitutional rights’

Rights are only meaningful if linked to remedies under an incentive compatible bond of law. India is very very poor. It only has about 15 million tax payers. People have to get richer so that the Government has enough money to actually provide remedies for rights violations. Otherwise we have nothing but 'buddhijivis' and 'andolanjivis' continually agitating for more and more rights which won't be enforced in the same manner that existing rights are a dead letter. Look at Ansari's cousins. Why do they get elected? It is because only the criminals will enforce some minimal rights for you- if it suits them. 

and to do so ‘without being isolated from the wider community’, and adaptation to the ‘thinking and practice of a fast-changing world.’

Wow! How truly profound!



Then, at a convocation at the Indian Law Institute a few days later, he cited former American President John Adam’s “premonition of the propensity of democracies to ‘commit suicide’”

Did the cretin really not know that America is still a democracy 200 years later?  

and sought “a new consensus on the imperatives of entitlement and empowerment”.

Consensus? Even if Aiyar and Ansari and a couple of their senile pals agree on something- it will still be meaningless shite.  

This must have sounded alarm bells in the ears of those of the ruling BJP circle who understood the acuteness of his somewhat elliptical comment.

I think the BJP 'ruling circle' had taken on board a book by an ex Intelligence man which highlighted Ansari's dubious role as Ambassador to Iran. What was alarming them was the possibility that the guy was a double agent.  


More bluntly to those who would be running the country shortly, allegedly to achieve the goals of the ‘neglected’ Sardar Patel, he began his Sardar Patel Memorial Lecture in 2012 by citing Sardar Patel, as recorded by his principal adviser, V.P. Menon, that ‘real integration has to take place in the minds of the people’.

As opposed to their rectums.  

This, in turn, required, as the political scientist, Rasheeduddin Khan,

an utterly vacuous JNU Professor 

had observed, ‘a congruence of diversities leading to a unity in which both the varieties and similarities are maintained.’

unless one can emigrate to somewhere a little less shitty

Even if this hint was heard by the ones to whom it was addressed, it was clearly not heeded by those whose alternative idea of India is focused on uniformity, and not diversity, leading to the unity of India.

It is a fact that non-Hindu majority areas are secessionist. The alternative is between further breaking up the country- with plenty of ethnic cleansing- or remaining a Hindu Nation with some non-Hindu appendages. But this is true of other countries as well. Either majorities impose a unity to their liking or they have no stake in maintaining a Union. 

In the very month that new challenges to the community manifested themselves with the astounding electoral victory of the BJP (May 2014),

Astounding? Modi was the only candidate put up by any party for the top job. 

Vice-President Ansari, addressed the AMU’s annual convocation, citing, as was his wont, the poet Allama Iqbal, the historian Paul Kennedy and the sociologist Will Kymlika,

that last is interesting. Kymlika argues for 'group specific rights'- i.e. no Uniform Civil Code.  The problem is that Muslims aren't like Maoris. They are converts of the same ethnic stock. There is no reason they should not adopt reformed mores along with everybody else.  

and said:

“The Muslims of India, in their self-perception, prioritize their problems (as): physical security, education and employment. Each is within the ambit of affirmative action.”

But the State is too poor to afford much 'action'. 


Yet, it is precisely such affirmative action that those imminently coming to power had been denigrating for decades as ‘appeasement’.

Aiyar is too stupid to see that being tough on Muslims was a vote winner all over the world.  

Ansari’s constitutional position was too delicately poised to overtly say so.

So he cheated.  

Instead, after having pointed to the need for State action, he attempted to alert his student audience to their duties as the intellectual leaders of their community:

“The deadweight of tradition, poverty and communal politics has resulted in Muslim women facing handicaps relating to literacy, economic power and autonomy…The net result is a pattern of structural disempowerment. Yet, social customs are neither sacred nor immutable…practical correctives can be introduced without transgression of values.”

 Rhetoric of this sort is neither sacred nor useful. Yet Ansari type cretins can indulge in nothing else. 


As regards the imperative of the ‘assertion of identity within the framework of diversity’, he urged that this endeavour be grounded in ours being a ‘plural society, a secular polity and a state structure that is democratic and based on the Rule of Law. Plurality is thus an existential reality’ and the students must contribute to this ‘on-going national priority’ not by ‘segregation, seclusion or self-imposed isolation,’ which would be ‘un-civic’, but by going beyond ‘tolerance of the other’ and moving towards ‘those who may be different’.

Join the RSS? Is that what he is saying? 

And, for its part, the State must ‘promote equal treatment’. It is only thus, said Ansari, for once quoting himself, that “if stars are to be plucked, they (the students) must develop the power to fly”

& if stars are to be fucked, students must indulge in mental masturbation while developing power to fly or be a fly or whatever.  

and “raqs karna hai to phir paaon ki zanjir na dekh” (if you would be free, look not at the fetters on your feet). The audience rose as one to applaud.

'raqs karna' means 'to dance'. I presume that Ansari was doing a lascivious belly-dance or was twerking suggestively and that his audience was greatly aroused. 

I do not know whether anyone has put it better after Jawaharlal Nehru in his AMU address in January 1948 when he was invited by the students of AMU, that had been a hotbed of the campaign for Pakistan,

“as free citizens of free India to play your role in the building up of this great country and to share in common with others the triumphs and setbacks alike that may come our way. The present with all its unhappiness and misery will pass. It is the future that counts…and it is that future that belongs to you.” (Quoted at p.140)

At Jammu in April 2016, two years after the nation had experienced the new regime, Ansari, addressed the convocation bearing in mind this remark by ‘a scholar (Christophe Jaffrelot) of Indian secularism’:

“religion is most threatening to liberal democracy when it informs national identity or permeates everyday life.”

Ansari didn't say this to young people in Islamic Republics. He did not condemn the Kerala Muslim League for being a Religious party. 

In any case, Jaffrelot was wrong. England is Anglican and has been a liberal democracy for a long time. 

Therefore, the Vice-President, entering the last year of his term, observed that as ‘secularism and composite culture (are) two sides of the same coin’, the State would best serve the Constitution by maintaining ‘equidistance and minimum involvement’ in matters of faith. The BJP was not so inclined but lacking the requisite majority restrained itself till that majority was delivered three years later.

Aiyar is ignoring the fact that it was the corruption and incompetence and intellectual vacuity of the dynasty he serves which opened the gate for the BJP. Governance isn't about talking incessant bollocks. Voters want value for money even if they only pay an exiguous amount in taxes. 


An opportunity to give a lecture at the Maulana Azad National Urdu University in April 2017 gave Ansari the opportunity of delivering a corrective to the saffron view of mediaeval history. He described the Qutb Shahi regime as having “detached religion from statecraft and culture from territorial boundaries”, thereby “not differentiating between Hindus and Muslims”, with “equality of opportunity” for both “for practically all the offices of state”. Thus, the period of Muhammad Quli Qutb Shah was “characterised by a spirit of camaraderie” between all religious communities. Ansari posed the question, obviously with the dispensation in New Delhi in mind: Can this “tradition of tolerance, coexistence, inclusiveness and cultural effervescence continue to signal its uniqueness and remain an example for the country?” New Delhi looked the other way.

Instead of emulating a regime Aurangazeb put an end to long ago. What is wrong with this pair of cretins? Do they not get that India should be emulating modern countries which got ahead by hard work and enterprise?


Ansari’s last public lecture as Vice-President was at the National Law School University in Bengaluru. Arguably it was his best (particularly because the ruling powers did not think it so). Basing himself on the bed-rock principle that the Constitution considers “citizenship is the sole determinant of Indianness”,

however, Indians of Muslim heritage who had fled across the border were not allowed back to claim Indian Citizenship. Ansari is wrong about the Indian Constitution. Indianness can exist in various degrees. But a Muslim whose father or grandfather crossed the border loses 'Indianness' whereas a Hindu gains citizenship even if recently arrived from Pakistan or Bangladesh or even Afghanistan.  

Ansari regretted that “while pluralism and secularism are sought to be diluted as the core principles of the polity, a third ‘ism’—nationalism—has been grafted in an exaggerated manifestation”.

But that 'nationalism' of an entirely Hindu type was there at the start. Cow protection is a directive principle. Hindi written in the Devanagari script is the official language. Bharat, not Hindustan, is the alternative official name of the country.  

This “version of nationalism” places “cultural commitments” at its “core and promotes intolerance and arrogant patriotism”, resulting in a “fragile national ego” and “hyper-nationalism” that closes the mind and is a “manifestation of insecurity about one’s place in the world”.

Says a member of a minority community. But eighty percent are Hindu.  

The “alternative to it is liberal nationalism”. Modi and his cohorts were not amused.

Nor greatly alarmed. Ansari sways no votes, though his murderous cousins may do so.  

In his post-VP incarnation, Ansari seeks, in the words of Hafiz, the legendary Persian poet:
Dar einshab-e-siyahum gum gushta rah-e-maqsood
Azgosha-e-barun aa ai Kaukab-e-hidayat

(In this dark night I have lost the desired path

O star of guidance come forth and show me the way)

Ansari certainly lost his way- if the way he had wanted to follow was one useful to India. Perhaps a 'star of guidance' will come forth for him. Or maybe he will simply die. 


Absolved of the responsibilities of constitutional office, he frankly and fiercely, but always politely, gives tongue to his many concerns: “in the short space of four years,” he said in his Fakhruddin Ahmed memorial lecture (July 2020), “India has made a very long journey. It has travelled from its founding vision of civic nationalism

when Muslims were slaughtered and ethnically cleansed and cow protection was put into the Constitution

to a new political imagery of cultural nationalism that seems embedded in the public domain”. He fears “a subversion of core values is now underway” and we are on a path of “populism” as “a strategy to obtain and retain power… thriving on conspiracy, criminalisation of all opposition, playing up external threats” and assisted by “authoritarianism, nationalism and majoritarianism”.

These stupid fools are worried about 'imagery'. They wasted their life as diplomats. They wasted their life as politicians. Now they talk bollocks in the belief they are hurting Modi and helping the Dynasty to which they owed their brown nosed eminence.  

He approvingly quotes A.G. Noorani

which bits? Is it Noorani's vitriol against Nehru?  

as saying Hindutva “seeks to subjugate and homogenise the ethnic pluralities by establishing the cultural hegemony of an imagined cultural mainstream”, and Mujibur Rahman’s view that this is ‘premised on a strategy of denigration seeking to submerge our polity’s democratic values of diversity and inclusiveness in an alternative paradigm of exclusion and homogenisation.’

Diplomacy and Academia can rot your brains if you start believing that words like 'paradigm' mean shit. Ansari is a sad case. Still, at least he isn't as uncouth as Aiyar.  

In the foreword he provides for Neera Chandhoke’s study, Rethinking Pluralism, Secularism and Tolerance,

which contains no thoughts whatsoever  

Ansari says Chandhoke makes ‘the essential point that secularism is not a stand-alone concept

Yes it is. Fredrick the Great was secular. But his Kingdom wasn't a Democracy. By contrast, England is Anglican while also being a democracy.  

and is intrinsically linked to democracy since a secular deficit in a plural society results in

what you have in England, not 

a denial of democratic rights to equality and equal share in its benefits.’

Why go on repeating nonsense? Kids nowadays can look up Wikipedia and see that England has an Established Church. Yet it is one of the most stable liberal democracies on Earth. Still, if Ansari wants to scold Islamic Republics for not being Secular, then he is welcome to do so.  

In August 2018, delivering the Prem Bhatia memorial lecture, Ansari made the point that “religion is not politics,

Why did he not do so in Iran? 

religiosity is not religion, and global order is premised on global interests”. Earlier, in March, at the Australian National University, he had underlined the fact that “Indian Islam has been remarkable for its identification with India, without ceasing to be Islamic.”

What is remarkable about that? Indian cats are Indian without ceasing to be cats. That's how predication works.  

That is why there have been so few Indian jihadis.

No. It is because the police torture your family till you give yourself up. Also, save for Kashmiris, there is little interest in recruiting Indians because of their perceived lack of martial qualities.  

That could change if discrimination is perceived as the leitmotif of India’s policy towards its 200-million strong minorities, a population larger than a handful of the UN membership.

But there are a 1000 million who will slaughter the 200 million if they run amok. It is easy to kill entire families and decimate entire neighborhoods. Indeed, ethnic cleansing pays for itself because land and women change hands.  

This the saffron brigade does not seem to understand as it caters relentlessly to its Hindutva vote-bank and stokes their prejudices, not comprehending, in Ansari’s words, that “Indian culture is not to be conceived as a static phenomenon tracing its identity to a single unchanging source; instead, it is dynamic and interrogates critically and creatively all that is new.”

Indian culture is like Pakistani culture. It can do ethnic cleansing and make a profit on it.  What it wants to 'interrogate critically' is cool stuff like K-Pop not yet more bollocks about some imaginary secular paradise under the Qutub Shahis.

That is the lasting message left by this highly informed, well-thought out and beautifully written account of nine decades as a proud Indian Muslim who has done India proud and of whom all right-minded Indians would be proud.

Right-minded Indians think Aiyar a cretin.  

This is the inspiring story of the journey undertaken by a ten-year old internally displaced Indian boy who took refuge in Rafi Ahmed Kidwai’s home at 6, King Edward’s Road in 1947 to re-enter the renamed 6, Maulana Azad Road home exactly 60 years later as the Vice-President of India. Read on.

This is not an inspiring story. It is a story about a kid who entered Nehru's most loyal sycophant's house at the age of 10 and remained, at the age of 90, what Jinnah called a 'show-boy' Muslim, for Nehru's dynasty. But, because Rahul is a cretin that dynasty is dying nasty & Aiyar & Ansari only exist to remind us that Congress misrule was a function of the abysmal quality of the minds it attracted. 


Tuesday, 14 May 2019

Mani Shankar Aiyar misfiring on Modi

The purpose of this blog, indeed the purpose of all my literary endeavours, is to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that Iyers are utterly ineducable and thus deserve Extremely Backward Caste Status.

Sadly, I can't rival Mani Shankar Aiyar in this respect.

Consider his latest article in 'Rising Kashmir'.
I think I have discovered why Modi loathes Jawaharlal Nehru so much.
It's because he let a cunt like you into the Foreign Service though, in 1962, you supported China against India while at Oxford. Modi, meanwhile, was attending an Army School where he joined the National Cadet Corps.
Nehru had a degree in Natural Sciences from the University of Cambridge.
His major was in Botany- considered a good cramming subject for the competitive exams but not a mark of intellectual distinction. That is why he thought it plausible to argue to his Dad that he was too stupid to pass the Bar exams- which required nothing but a little cramming and the eating of dinners. Daddy, who had passed those same exams, put his foot down and so sonny boy did become a barrister.
It made him realize that to pull India and Indians out of superstition, from what Gurudev Rabindranath Tagore called “the dreary desert sands of dead habit”, modern India must cultivate a “scientific temper”, an expression that drives sanghis nuts because they like to believe the “udan katholas” of mythology were the earliest F-16s to be invented by Hindus and that Hindu plastic surgery, not a transplant operation, is what led to an elephant’s head surmounting Lord Ganesh.
Tagore had no degree and refused to become a barrister. But he did write some introductory books of a scientific nature for kids. The tragedy of the Tagore family was that the one promising scientists- who was also expected to take over their branch of the Brahmo Samaj- died young. That's why Rabi had to ponce around in robes.

For a poor and neglected section of the population to attain a 'scientific temper'- being sent to Cambridge is not an option. Instead, it is right and proper to suggest that the ancestors of those people had made scientific advances. Thus, they themselves can rise up through a scientific education. As a matter of fact, Hindus were ahead of Europe in terms of plastic surgery. One reason for this was that Indians had the habit of chopping off the noses of stupid cunts like Aiyar and thus there was a market for rhinoplasty.
Both these stunningly illiterate claims come from the mouth of none less than the PM of our country, whose acquaintance with higher education has gone no further than lying about degrees from Delhi and Gujarat University that he never got and who can obviously not tell a scientific proposition from a ‘dhokla’.
Yet Modi has achieved much while Mani is a laughing stock shunned by his own party because he loses them votes.
That, in itself, would not matter. For neither Indira Gandhi nor Rajiv Gandhi had a University degree and yet made good, perhaps even great, Prime Ministers.
The difference is that both Indira and Gandhi attended Cambridge. They didn't get degrees because they were too stupid and lazy. Rajiv was a terrible Prime Minister. But then, you had your hooks into him didn't you, you slimy little reptile?
Statesmanship is not a civil services exam and it is not necessary to go to University to reach the pinnacle of government.
Indira and Rajiv went to University. They still didn't get a degree. Rahul, on the other hand, did get an M.Phil from Cambridge. But he is a moon calf. He could have become P.M in 2013 but would not step up to the plate.
Perhaps the most famous example of that is Winston Churchill. But why lie about one’s educational qualifications – or lack of them? Unless, of course, such lying is a compulsive psychological disorder.
Mani may be a compulsive liar- a Diplomat, as the old English adage goes, lies abroad for his country. But, intelligent, useful lies are required. Stupidity, even if alethic, is to be avoided. Why does this idiot mention Churchill? Does he not know that Churchill attended Sandhurst? It would have been highly unusual for a professional soldier or sailor to attend University though there were some exceptions- e.g. Douglas Haig.

As for Modi- he probably does have B.As and M.As gained as an external student. It was one of the perks of his job- which otherwise offered precious little in material terms. Modi also attended a short course in the US focusing on P.R & 'image management'. Clearly, that proved a very good investment for his Party.
We have just heard from our PM (yes, he is the nation’s PM for another ten days or so) that he ordered the Indian Air Force to strike at Balakot despite heavy cloud cover because while senior Air Force officers were trembling their knees pleading for postponement of the strike till the weather improved, he (MODI) thumped his 56-inch chest and saw that heavy cloud cover was actually good for the Indian Air Force because Pakistani radar would not be able to penetrate thick black clouds.
Sadly for Aiyar, we can all now Google 'effect of heavy clouds on radar' and find that there is indeed significant detection range attenuation under heavy fog. On the other hand, assuming India was using a particular type of Israeli technology which has optical targeting, senior Air Force officers may well have wanted to wait. However, if the GPS coordinates were being supplied by a foreign power, the P.M would have been in a better position to make a judgment call. In this case, it seems reasonable to prefer GPS to optical targeting more particularly if a foreign power was providing real time satellite surveillance.
This is to insult our brave airmen and, above all, the Chief of Air Staff.
Nonsense! Chief of Air Staff knows very well that a foreign government may be providing helpful information on a top secret basis.
Not one of them was so ignorant of the fact that radar is not a telescope whose vision can be clouded over.
However, depending on the type of radar, there is detection range attenuation. Once again, this is an intelligence matter where a foreign government may have had superior knowledge which it shared on a top secret basis.
Radar is used precisely because, whatever the weather conditions, it can pinpoint incoming aircraft.
No it can't. Sophisticated attack vehicles take counter-measures. Atmospheric conditions are one variable among many. Modi is not a drunken buffoon like Mani. He was well briefed and took the right decision. No doubt, he is revealing this now for a strategic reason. One side of it is to signal something to the Pakistanis. The other is to get draw out idiots like Mani. Modi knows that the Indian middle class of today is tech savvy. They may not know much about Churchill, but they do take an interest in things like Cauchy's dispersion formula.
Did Modi take his senior-most Air Force officers for fools that he could trot out such ridiculous unscientific rubbish before them? And were they so pusillanimous that they dared not correct such a vacuous Prime Minister?
The only fool here is Mani Shankar Aiyar. Air force officials know there is an 'arms race' between anti-aircraft radar and the attack platform's counter-measures. Atmospheric conditions are one variable among many. If the Air force knew about the optical targeting capacity of the weapons but not that GPS targeting was third party sourced, then Modi's narrative makes sense.

The truth is probably more complicated than that. After all, there's a reason why this is the first Indian airstrike on Pakistan since 1971. Clearly Modi has made some useful friends on his foreign jaunts. By contrast, Rajiv Gandhi- when not firing Iyer Foreign Secretaries- was meeting Julius Nyrere and Kenneth Kaunda and screwing up royally in Sri Lanka.
This insult to our defence forces compounds another insult directed at senior officers of the Navy who were involved in December 1988 in transporting Rajiv Gandhi, then Prime Minster of India, and his good lady from off-shore Thiruvananthapuram to the Lakshadweep islands to witness the annual naval exercises that had been scheduled months earlier. Admiral L. Ramdas, then Flag Officer Commanding-in-Chief, Southern Command, and later Chief of Naval Staff, has gone on record certifying that only Rajiv and Sonia were on board INS Viraat when it sailed to Lakshadweep. Three other very senior Navy officers - Admirals Arun Kumar, Madanjeet Singh and Pasricha - who had personal knowledge of the voyage because they were involved in the arrangements, including one who was to succeed Ramdas as Chief of  Naval Staff, have publicly affirmed that there were NO foreigners on board the aircraft carrier.
Pasricha and Madanjeet Singh were taped by Vice Admiral Harinder Singh so as to prove that his senior officer was denying him promotion due to personal animus. The Admiral sought to use those tapes as evidence of transgression on Harinder Singh's part. But it is against natural justice for a whistleblower to be sacked for gathering evidence against a refractory superior.

There was a big scandal about this back when Mani was still relatively compos mentis. People can check the thing on Google for themselves. Why is Mani pretending that 'Madanjeet Singh and Pasricha' weren't then, and aren't now, timeservers simply?

The allegation that foreigners were on board was made by a serving Naval officer. Why has he not been sued for libel?

I can publicly affirm anything I like. I may lie and lie and yet escape any penalty for perjury. It is a different matter if I do it, under oath, in a Court of Law.
If after four of the senior-most Naval officers have said so, does not decency demand that Modi withdraw the allegations he has made about Rajiv using the Indian Navy as a ”personal taxi” to ferry “foreigners” to a holiday on one of the islands, Bangaram?
Decency does not demand this. Indians think that 'senior-most' Naval officers want to stay on the right side of the dynasty because of the sinecures that come their way after retirement. Some, like former Admiral Vishnu Bhagwat, may go the extra mile to try to topple a BJP government even if it means being bilged out themselves. I may point out that it was the LSE educated 'untouchable' and former senior IFS officer, President Narayanan, who took the lead in this matter.

Narayanan was married to a lady from Burma. This never affected his professional decisions. Bhagwat was married to a half Muslim, half Parsee Communist. This could have been useful to our country when the Soviet Union still existed. It wasn't almost a decade later. An Admiral who fights the government, with his wife running the show, is no sort of Defense Chief. He is the only officer to have ever been stripped of rank and sacked.

Some journalists at the time tried to make out that President Narayanan was against this. They were telling stupid lies. Narayanan was from Kerala. He wasn't stupid.

As a Tambram myself, I have no hesitation in saying that any Malyallee is superior to us in Diplomacy. Narayanan was an adornment to his cadre. Mani was an abomination.

As a matter of record, it is only fair to point out that Harinder Singh was not 'anti-Muslim'. He hadn't attacked his superior's wife as 'half Muslim'. The guy was a gentleman from a rather superior sort of family. Bhagwat did go to Sanawar, but on a scholarship. Harinder Singh's background was top-drawer professional- his Dad was a Surgeon and he went to Bishops Cotton, Simla. Only an idiot like Prem Shankar Jha would have thought such a man would rant and rave against 'half Muslims'.

On the other hand, Jha knew Niloufer Bhagwat- who had previously used her husband's position to launch an attack on the Shiv Sena in Mumbai. She did rant and rave against all and sundry and was twisting her husband around her little finger. It was she who caused the Admiral to make baseless charges against his subordinates. Hubby was dismissed and gained ignominy. Her star rose. She gained fame as an activist. Though her husband's career was destroyed, perhaps her earning power, as a 'constitutional lawyer' increased precisely because she caused her husband- an honest enough officer-  to violate India's constitution. This was a case of cherchez la femme with a capitalist twist!

Niloufer, the Communist, did do some damage to George Fernandes, the Leftist. She played the Muslim card against a Christian. But this was only one episode in the long drawn out circular firing squad that marked the death throes of the Indian Left.

Mani, being a worthless pile of shite, was never considered a true Leftist by the likes of Niloufer. Also he was declasse and his accent not quite quite. Us Iyers are like that only. We are not heirs to broad acres, but vidushak clowns thrown up by the flawed combinatorics of adversely selective competitive examinations.

Still, if Mani genuinely believes Modi has committed an offence, then the Law offers an avenue of redress. But Mani is too stupid to go down the Subramaniyam Swamy route. So is Subramaniyam Swamy, precisely because he is a similarly deracinated dobi ka ghat, not Palghat, Iyer. But Swamy married a Parsee lawyer who should have been elevated to the Bench in the early Seventies on the basis of academic brilliance.  He too has brought disgrace on Iyers because he hasn't an ounce of Hindu humility.

How dared Swamy cast aspersions on Sonia- a pativrata widow- who is truly Indian for the same reason that Ruth, in the Old Testament, is truly Jewish?

His disgusting slurs caused us to see her true virtues. Yet, Swamy presents himself as a great friend of Rajiv!

Mani makes the same claim. But he has hurt Sonia and is now hurting Rahul. He was told to shut up, but emboldened by Pitorda's debacle, he has returned to wreak havoc. I am not saying that a fucking Dosco cocksucker can affect Indian elections. I am saying that Mani's casteism hurts Rahul because Rahul has now come out as a fellow Shaivite Brahman. Dalit intellectuals have always been amongst the smartest and best informed precisely because they were more likely to go to LSE than Oxford. They know about 'cheap talk' equilibria. What Mani and Pitordia have inadvertently done is show that the dynasty has no intellectuals with experience of office who will speak up now. Jairam Ramesh was supposed to be Rahul's Dronacharya. Look at his twitter account. The thing is pitiful.

Dalits- but also Muslim (again, some of the smartest, most patriotic, most decent people around)- are looking at this 'cheap talk' signaling deficit and drawing their own conclusions. We can all understand that the RSS will happily sacrifice Modi so as to get a foothold in West Bengal- the intellectual Ayodhya of Hindu India- which is why he and Amit Shah will have to go fight the invincible Mamta on her own turf and get mauled in the process. But we also know India wants not just good relations with Bangladesh, we want to emulate their Human Development success story. I am a big fat Hindu man. I want to invest my paltry savings in factories employing lots of Muslim women. I also want the truck drivers to be 'namazi' Muslims who aren't drunk off their head. Consider 'open defecation'. Muslims have much lower rates for this for purely religious reasons. As a Brahman, I would naturally like to shit all over the place like the holy cow. However, as an economist, I have to accept that my financial security in old age depends on my accepting this Muslim measure- championed by that bearded, Muslim looking, Modi- which will give females in rural areas security while answering a call of nature.

I genuinely hate all Muslims- especially Pakistanis- coz they are nice to me and bring me nice food and so on coz they think Hindus are nice people and maybe they were once good at studies or something of that sort. THIS IS A SATANIC PLOT AGAINST IYERS! As the careers of Mani Shankar Aiyar and Subramaniyam Swamy has conclusively proved- Iyers are moral imbeciles and complete mental fucking retards! Hence, we should immediately get not just OBC but Untouchable status!

I have written not just to Modi, but also Gadkare Sahib on this issue. Amit Shah, on the other hand, can go fuck himself. Me Tarzan, he Jain.

How dare Mani cast aspersions on our elected Head of Government? Easily. Aspersion casting is not illegal. How one responds is what matters. Modi does it cleverly. Mani does it stupidly.
How dare he cast aspersions on the patriotism of such distinguished veterans of our defence forces?
Modi is casting aspersions not on their patriotism but their venality and eagerness to please the dynasty. This is entirely credible.
Either Modi is lying or these four senior, if retired, naval officers are lying. How could two of them have been promoted to the rank of Chief of Naval Staff (CNS) – the highest post that a naval officer could aspire to - if their record had been blotted by their allowing unauthorized foreigners to be on board a naval ship bristling with the latest in warfare technology?
They were promoted by the Dynasty and its minions. How could they have avoided the sack if they had not bent the knee? What fantasy world is Mani living in? In any case, it was a Naval officer who made the original charge which Modi's people picked up.

Mani may be accused of 'anti-national activity'. However, he is a great asset to the BJP. He has turned his own anglophile Tambram class against Congress. Instead, we are now cheering for some Hindi speaking Gujju who is dismantling the caste system and raising the intellectual prestige of diverse occupational groups. This may be good for India, but it is bad for entrenched elites. It may be good for Hinduism as a great Soteriological Religion but it is bad for Hindus who butter their bread by pretending to be Secular and sucking up to Pakistan.
Modi needs to be warned that he is guilty of anti-national activity in trying to ride on the sacrifices of our army and CRPF martyrs in a dirty election campaign; of defaming the Indian Air Force by portraying them as complaisant idiots in his scientific illiteracy; and the Indian Navy as being packed at its highest echelons with traitors who would acquiesce in unauthorized foreigners being allowed to board a top of the line defence vessel.
Fuck is wrong with this cretin? The P.M is the head of Government. What he authorizes, is authoritative. A serving officer must first resign his commission and only then seek judicial or legislative review of any order he considers ultra vires. Consider the fate of Admiral Bhagwat. He was stripped of his rank and dismissed from service for refusing an order.  Mani knows this all too well- slimy little reptile that he is. Why is he telling us such stupid lies?

The answer of course is that, like me, Mani is fighting for the rights of us Iyers to be recognized as not just Educationally Backward but Mentally fucking Retarded and thus Constitutionally eligible for affirmative action.
But then, why bother? Modi will, in any case, be ousted by the people of India by 23 May. That would be a fitting end to the PM. Remember how I described him on 7 December 2017? Was I not prophetic?
Mani described Modi as 'neech'- lowly. This led to his own Party ostracizing him. Why? Currently Tamil Brahmins count as high caste whereas Modi's Ghanchi community counts as 'lowly'. Thanks to the brilliance of Mani Shankar Aiyar- not to mention people like me- Iyers will soon be regarded as the most 'neech' of all! Mani is a true prophet- verily a Moses!- who will lead us from jobs in I.T or Accountancy- to the Promised Land of affirmative action overflowing with the Milk & Honey of jobs as peons and chaprasees. Thank you Mani! Doon School must be so proud.