I am far from being an acolyte of Barrister M.K. Gandhi. However, I have today resolved to return all the orders, decorations, and titles, posthumous or otherwise, bestowed on me for meritorious conduct and outstanding service to the British Empire in protest at what constitutes, in my considered opinion, the worst aspect of Gen. Dyer's recent frightfulness.
Indeed, as I write this now- more in sorrow than anger- my heart goes out to the gentle and suffering Moti and Jawahar Lal Nehrus, and their toiling team of fellow Indian National Congress lawyers, as they take depositions from witnesses to the Amritsar Massacre and the blood drains from their faces and they stare at each other in wordless horror trying for the life of them to figure out how precisely they are supposed to uphold their sworn duty, as seasoned officers of the court, to most royally fuck these peasants over even unto the seventh generation.
'Cometh the hour, cometh the man'. I have lately learnt that Barrister Gandhi- whom I feel it would be churlish to further deny the honorific 'Mahatma' or 'great soul' as the Bengalis have it- has taken charge of this nice bit of legal business.