Wednesday, 2 September 2015

Sorrow's Cenacle

By such wind to be winnowed tho' the wheat be lost
Let Grief be the Gospel of Ruth's Pentecost
Tongues of flame all the livelong till at dusk we talk
A murmuration of starlings in sight of the hawk

Under Heaven, where any Two are gathered, Soteriological Resistance is the Third
Prince! Till Six or Seven define topological distance for its Bird.


001 Ace Fire Dragon said...

Something on grief... seems like a group of people discussing some sorrowful event. Am I right? Or does it hold some other meaning?

To be honest, life is really frustrating for me. I don't express my inner sanctum (mind and thoughts) to anyone, just to avoid antagonizing or troubling them. Sometimes, I feel like I'm already too old and ready to pass away, but the future looks intolerably long and very agonizing. To be honest, everyone at home is nice and open, but I have too many mental problems. All this aggravated especially after late 2013, when I started looking into international politics. That was the triggering point of a chain reaction which made me oscillate and become a super nationalist bigot at first and then a super Tamil bigot later on. I also interacted with Nazi apologetics at times.

It came and then it got dissipated. My interest in Saivism and Saiva Siddhantha is the only thing keeping me afloat. My biggest mistake in life: following international politics. And that's why I stopped watching TV and Internet news altogether. But its aftereffects still remain. I've just entered a psychological paralysis. I'm at risk of contracting OCD and schizophrenia. There are other factors like I've never gone out at all for 11+ years despite my parents objecting to it and been constantly staying at home. But that may be a cause.

001 Ace Fire Dragon / Iniyavel Sugumar.

windwheel said...

The 'Cenacle' means the upper room in which the Last Supper was held. It is also the place where the Holy Spirit descended on the disciples and they began their mission.
The question arises- why should the Lord make us experience unbearable sorrow more especially of an imaginary sort- e.g. mental torment- when the message received through the Saints is so full of joy? One answer is that it is better to receive a terrible fright in a dream because when you wake up you get the insight that fear and evil conspiracies and the weakness we feel in nightmares are completely illusory.
You write well and it is a mark of Grace that if you start going down a wrong or delusionary road you yourself feel it. We should pity those who gain something by going down the wrong road.
Terms like OCD, Schizophrenia etc sound very frightening. In fact the things that can go wrong with our body or our relationships have simple causes and simple remedies. We are encouraged to think that 'normality' means working and making money- whereas what it means is experiencing joy from small things. Work is good because it feels good. There is a technique called 'Mindfulness' which is like Meditation/ Yoga etc but very practically focused. I used to like cooking but dislike washing up. Now, using mindfulness, I take joy in cleaning- and look forward to it.
Nowadays, all around the world, a lot of very good and smart young people are facing a new type of problem- disinclination to go out. Sometimes there is an underlying illness or social problem- e.g. crime infested streets- but there is another factor which all people of all ages are experiencing- viz. new technology has made 'virtual world' more attractive, more efficacious, but also a source of 'instant gratification'. Indian culture is very ancient and it has known periods of both great wealth and great poverty- now we are in a mixed regime but still, God's bounty has not stinted. Message of the Sages remains relevant at all times.
It seems you are getting much more insight now and maybe this is linked to the fact that you are researching a topic or Spiritual Worth. I am just an ignorant fellow, but after all, I am quite old and have seen the ups and downs of worldly life. I think, as your mental energy becomes concentrated on Research of this Universally Beneficient type, your curiosity to visit places of Healing will increase.
In my family, there were examples of people called 'head case' and so on, but after a period of decades, suddenly it would turn out that the 'barrier' between them and the world had served a Sublime purpose. Nowadays, people have money and are in a hurry to spend it. Nothing wrong with consulting Doctors etc- they also have to earn to satisfy their momentary cravings!- and, of course, body should be considered just a vehicle on hire, or provided for the job, for which we should do the maintenance, therefore why not help advance Medical Science by adding to its 'data set' for any relevant therapy. However, it is peer-support, helping others overcome same problem as oneself, that is the source of Joy. Message of the Saints is nothing but this Joy. Even the body of a Deva in 'bhoga-bhumi' is not desirable because scope for this higher Joy is absent.
Why not email me on any time you are feeling low? The big danger in talking to other people about one's problems is everyone thinks they are an expert and starts telling you what to do- this is called 'prescriptivism' and is tied to 'Judgmental attitude'. When we internalize Judgmentalism we enter a world of delusion which is joyless though it may appear that one is gaining money and fame and other such shiny shiny things which are unreal.

windwheel said...

International politics, or indeed politics of any sort, appears to have 'prescriptive' force. However, it is interesting that Yuddhishtra's vishaada (depression, mental paralysis) is dispelled by learning Statistical Game Theory. This is because he is a Principal- i.e. the person who employs others to do what he wants. But he was having a problem deciding what was the right thing to do. Maths is the method by which Decision theory can be fully analysed. Arjuna, by contrast, was not a Principal, he only wanted to serve the person he believed to be his eldest brother. He too experienced Vishaada, but didn't have to learn Maths. Why? As an Agent, it was not required of him. Lord Krishna could absolve him of all anxiety and take any error or sin onto Himself. When we care for our body or mood, we should remember we are acting as an agent of the Lord who wishes us to know Joy.
The lady experiences terrible pain in child birth. But she does not regret it once the child is born. Creative artists- like Emily Dickinison, though seemingly living quietly in her room, was experiencing much tragedy and heartache. Her poetry is still considered amongst the finest produced in the English language.
Anyway, God bless and do be in touch anytime you feel like a chat.