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Saturday, 2 August 2014

Meredith Townsend's influence on Jawaharlal Nehru

Nehru was just a fresh faced fourteen year in his first year at Harrow when he found Meredith Townsend's article 'Will England Retain India?' in the pages of his favorite Spank Mag.
The experience permanently scarred him and explains much about his later proclivities.

Townsend was a senior journalist who had lived in India. His essay explains that the British Empire had inspired no loyalty whatsoever in any class of native and would be swept away in a moment if it met any military setback. Worse luck for India, because
1) Brown People are all basically Ali Babas and are motivated not by self-interest but 'interestingness'-i.e the desire to live in an Arabian Nights fantasy land of despotic Sultans and sultry odalisques and everybody either getting their head chopped off or being offered a Palace with a well stocked harem, preferably all in the same day but not in that order.
2) If White people have sex with Brown people the kids will be black and Black people live in grass huts and go ooga-booga and wave their spears around.
3) Brown people and White people don't like having sex with each other but the mere presence of a very few White people in India had, over the course of a century, turned the local Brown people into Black people- incapable of once again building cities like Benares- though for some reason they still do better than White people in Competitive Exams.

So there you have it. A highly respected editor, writing in 1904, demonstrates that
1) British rule in India is totally unviable
2) The British Ruling Class has shit for brains.
What's the boy Nehru's takeaway point from all this?
Whitey be stealing all our wealth! Fuck you Whitey! Kindly invent Socialism already and explain it to some clever Bengalis so India can have a Planning Commission same as the Soviets do.

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